At what point will a quantity of something push us over the edge? No one was to blame for differing interpretations of the word. With Facebook but a year old, that year also marked the dawn of social media. Putting aside feelings of jealousy and the fear of abandonment, Anna and I were left with a thought experiment: Not only for ourselves, but for our relationships, our community, and the earth. The world and its seven billion inhabitants offered an untold variety of sexual experiences. Implicit in her question were bigger ones that apply to design, consumption, scale, nature, and our ecological future: Not long ago, her husband had an epiphany that he confided to her:
Mara Zepeda is the co-founder and CEO of Switchboard, a platform that strengthens alumni and affinity communities by helping their members help one another. I learned much of that world from him and others, and then I changed; I entered the world of labor-saving machines and of limitless cheap fossil fuel. My grandfather lived a life of limits, both suffered and strictly observed, in a world of limits. We had entered an era of limitlessness, or the illusion thereof, and this in itself is a sort of wonder. And the answer will sit on a spectrum. In the world of Facebook and the amassing of friends, this finite but infinitely deep intimacy is the impulse some of us wish to return, and yet most of us choose to reject. It behooves us to see and to say honestly where we stand, and respect the variety of individual beliefs. What can we learn to apply to our lives and our online spaces when we consider a future without husbandry? Here is one of the few effective keys to the Design problem: And to sustain implies a promise of restraint. Other times, a relationship lasted a few months. Design depends largely on constraints, said Charles Eames. He thought of sex as an act of physical exploration akin to playing sports. And ultimately, she saved herself. Each of us will find our own answer. He meant that he had discovered a sexual identity of sorts. As one does in times like these, Anna and I found ourselves consulting the Oxford English Dictionary to look up the etymology of the word husband. Sex, Husbandry, and the Infinite Scroll How will we know when enough is enough? Each new person in isolation was, in theory, fine, Anna said. Constraints, by definition — within a marriage, a town, or a digital environment — limit what is possible. It appears that most and perhaps all of industrial agriculture's manifest failures are the result of an attempt to make the land produce without husbandry. And yet pursuing anything in quantity — sexual relationships, love, money, LaCroix, iPhones — offers us the opportunity to consider some alternative definitions of what does, intuitively and individually, feel sustainable. Each problem has its own peculiar list. His body wanted to collide with other bodies without boundaries or restrictions, without limits and free of moral judgment. To husband, then, meant to orient oneself toward thrift, conservation, and long-term thinking.
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